Mr. Pookies passed away suddenly last night. We miss him terribly. Goodbye, buddy.
I Missed My Slaves
My slaves were gone for a couple of days. As much as you may think this excites a cat, it doesn’t—there’s nobody around to pet me when I want them to.
I made sure my slaves knew I was upset that they left by yowling at them half the night. I can be very vocal when I want to be.
I even managed to melt the smaller slave’s replacement slaves’ hearts and get them to turn on the shower for me. They thought it was ridiculous and weren’t going to do it, but my howling persuaded them. All I have to do is sound like I’m about to die and they’ll do anything I want them to.
Garage Fascination
I have a fascination with the garage that the slaves completely don’t understand. That’s just because they don’t know what I’m building in there…
Morning Tactics
One of my favorite tactics to use in the morning on the smaller slave is what I like to call my pillow tactic. When the big slave leaves, one side of the bed is vacated and warm, but I like to climb up the side of the bed and walk over the small slave’s pillow until she moves enough for me to lay down on it. For some reason she tolerates this.
Thunderstorms
Last night there was a huge thunderstorm, with crazy lightning and wind and rain. Being certain this was karma coming to get me for all the peeing, puking, etc I’ve done, I cowered under the slaves’ feet by the couch so they would be struck before I would. It never got me, so I’m good now. I’ve got to go, I have things to puke on.
Hacking Stuff Up
One of the best things about being a cat is you can hack up the nastiest things all over the place. My slaves have hardwood floors, so I like to find one of the few carpeted parts of the house to hack up my furballs. This is how I show them I love them, I pay special attention to things.
The slaves think I am sick or have had a rough time of it, but really I just enjoying throwing up on their stuff.
Shower Time
I love taking showers. I have a magic meow that turns on the water whenever I want to. All I do is start meowing, and the big slave wakes up and turns on the water for me. I especially enjoy showering when the slaves are sleeping.
I like to show my appreciation to my slaves by curling up on their pillows after I have had my shower. They’re quite absorbent.
Blanket Mutilation
I like to claw my blankets, the ones the human slaves are always using. I knead them with my front paws so I can get maximum claw penetration, then tear outward. To keep the slaves from bothering me, I purr while I destroy the blankets, which they think is cute. This is all part of my master plan.
Cuddle Tactics
Sometimes I like to lull my slaves into a false sense of security—I will cuddle up to them, and let them pet me, then I scratch them just to let them know I’m a cat and not a toy.
Introduction
Since this is a new blog, I thought I’d introduct myself. I’m a Bengal, and I love to take showers. I have two human slaves that wait on me hand and foot. The bigger slave has his own blog. I didn’t like the smaller one much at first, so I peed on her stuff. She got over it, though, and we’re friends now.
